Accepting And Going Towards Anxiety

Anxiety is something that every person faces at some point in their lives. There is an evolutionary basis for its existence, namely to warn us when we are in danger so that we can take the steps needed to survive that danger. If we are not anxious and cautious when walking into the dark cave, the tiger will jump out of the dark and kill us. Thankfully, we do not live in caves anymore, but the mechanisms to anxiety warnings still exist in our brains. The key is recognizing it, accepting it, and managing and in many cases embracing it.

In my work and reading of different trends going on in society regarding anxiety. There is no doubt that the percentage of those struggling with it has been going up, especially coming out of the pandemic. However, why is this happening and impacting so many students, athletes, and those in the general population. I think given my experience and information I've seen several trends.

The first trend I have seen and I agree with is the over talking or hyperfixation on the concept of anxiety in society. While it is great to have more awareness of its existence, the definition and those living or being effected by it has been watered down. Everyone these days gets on social media and talks and shares their anxiety. It brings so much attention and indirect reinforcement to those in those moments that it almost becomes trendy to be an anxious person. Some professionals are wondering are we just talking about it too much and as a result fueling the rise in anxiety. I agree with this as yes you can overly validate and provide too much reassurance to those struggling with anxiety, which will only increase its existence. In fact I spend a lot of time with clients (and parents) on how to not give this reassurance and learn to manage or live with the anxiety in order to break the cycle of development.

A second trend I am seeing is that adversity or challenges in life should not exist. It is interesting that many people think this way coming out of the pandemic after how trying and stressful it was for many people. However, in some respects it appears parts of society, including schools and sports programs lowered their demands and expectations and the result is those in society believe things are too hard. The irony is that many of these demands and challenges are simply normal to their stage in life, but yet this is foreign concept to many. It is time we realize challenges happen and it is a normal part of life. The amount of time I need to reinforce this concept in treatment is growing every day.

Along with the acceptance that adversity exists is the third trend that we are seeing, specifically not letting kids (and some adults) sit with uncomfortable feelings or thoughts. We need to really reinforce that adversity, challenges, and failure is beneficial to a person's mental health. Not teaching these lessons is becoming an every growing mistake, and ultimately contributes to an increase in anxiety.

So given these trends now what do we do? Step one we need to make sure we are not overly reinforcing anxiety in people or watering down what anxiety really is. We need to start normalizing various life stressors and letting people know life is hard and challenging. and guess what that is okay. You are a better person when this is done. We need to help people learn to the skills to manage anxiety as they can be learned. Finally, since it is a normal emotion we need to accept its existence and embrace it. Rather than letting it debilitate our mindset, we can go towards it and see that it cannot control us. Yes it may spike to start, but going towards it, helps a person become desensitized and it pops like a bubble. Remember for all people anxiety can facilitate performance if we interpret it from that perspective or use it to problem solve or motivate us to change something in our lives. I was always come back to this lesson from cousin who I know did his own therapy. ''Can I control this situation? Yes or No? If it is yes than why am I worried as I can solve the problem, and if it is no why I am worried cause I can't control it anyhow''. I think hi statement pretty much sums everything up. Peak Mental Performance Coaching is ready to help you learn this process.